Humans are like birds. We peck at food and are attracted to shiny objects. However some of us are more attracted to shiny objects than others, and wear their whole collection of shiny objects around their necks and heads and feet and ankles and arms. Why do you do this? Is it a portable nest? Do you have to have the maxiumum shininess? Is to make up for the fact you don't have plumage? Are you trying to blind everyone in a five mile radius? Perhaps it's a personal vendetta against people who can see. Or maybe you think that a man much like yourself will follow you around because of how sparkly you are?
Number One Turn On: Shininess |
You're halfway to here... |
Now men. We know you like to accesorize too. But necklaces? The only time this looks appropriate is when you're on the beach, with a golden body that's well chisled. Let us pause for effect. And daydreaming...
Yes. |
"I like my men shiny... wait... just in shiny armor" -Chief Glamzilla
"With rings on her fingers and bells on her toes... she'll look like Lady Gaga wherever she goes." -Srgt. McDiscopants
-Don't let us down! Keep your clothes on! We'll decide if you need to take them off or not.-
Lt. Grunge
Chief Glamzilla
Srgt. McDiscopants
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