Thursday, January 13, 2011

OH MY HECK. Don't be such a beardo.

Dear Men,
We know we've been neglecting you since we're pretty sure that you don't wear ugg boots and sweats or sundresses and tights in the middle of winter. Well, actually we hope you never wear those. Not that there's anything wrong with that... well. Yes. There is in a fashion standpoint. Anyways, we're now here to remedy the fact we've been ignoring you.
In this cold weather it seems that many of you have decided to grow some hair upon your chinny-chin-chin. But some of you are begining to look like the big bad wolf.
Ow ow! I think he's in my Psych class...


Pretty much, when your start confusing your beard with you chest hair, it's time for a trim. Mainly on your neck. We know this is Utah, but you are not a pioneer. We do have access to razors, and if you don't we're sure that you can go to the Center for Women and Families and pick one up. Or if you''re growing a beard to prove your manliness to yourself, listen to Grog's advice...

Grog get rock.
Grog chop hair off neck.
Grog no cut off head.
YAY GROG!

It's not that we have anything against facial hair. If you can grow it then show it, but please. Keep it asthetically pleasing to everyone else around you. Just because you feel like a mountain man, doesn't mean you have to look like one.


"There's a reason the mountain men went extinct. Think about it." -Lt. Grunge
"No girl wants to risk getting road rash because you have a beard." - Cheif Glamzilla
"I shave my legs. Now you shave your face." -Srgt. McDiscopants

-Don't let us down, Keep your clothes on. We'll decide if you need to take them off or not.-

Lt.Grunge, Cheif Glamzilla and Srgt. McDiscopants

3 comments:

  1. So agreed!!! I absolutely HATE facial hair when it is crazily overgrown. Gross gross gross!
    P.S. Your blog is absolutely hilarious and I LOVE it! :)

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  2. Thank you mysterious commenter! We appreciate being told how great we are :) Keep up the good work! Also... subscribe :)

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  3. Ew! Yes! I definitely hate lots and lots of facial hair not attractive!! It's not even No Shave November!!

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